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Monday, May 09, 2005
The Assignment Gods Must Have It In For Me

If you haven't noticed the title of this blog before, it's called 'Dude, Where's The Beach...' For those who know me well enough it's quite obvious that a majority of my psychological makeup is derived from growing up on the sandy beaches of the Monterey Bay. Ever since joining the military I really haven't been near a real ocean in 6 years. Matter of fact, I've been landlocked for way too long, and the lack of salty air and sand between my toes is seriously taking its toll.

Two months ago the Assignment Gods smiled down on me and sent a TPS Memo stating that I would be moving to Los Angeles to live on the beach. When I got that notice I knew my prayers had been answered and life was once again sweet.

Well, last week the Gods struck me down. LA was pulled, and I was forced into perpetual purgatory to await my next assignment. (My fellow cubicle forest dwellers didn't understand why I fell to my knees and shouted 'WHY GOD, WHYYYYYY!')

Could be days, could be months. My luck, I'll end up in the Dakotas, Tennessee, or even worse... Utah. I don't know... All I do know is that I am once again without a beach.

I'm finished being Mr. Nice Guy. Time to start cutting down cubicle walls and unscrewing doorknobs. Better yet, I'm headed to Home Depot to get a few bags of sand, some tiki-torches, and an inflatable palm tree. I can't take it anymore.

posted by El Capitan at 5:49 PM


3 Comments:
Blogger pacos_gal said...

This is so true *sigh* If you are from the beach area, then nowhere else is going to even come close to feeling right.
I'm from the Monterey/Santa Cruz area too, now living in Canada, and I miss the smell of the ocean, the sounds, the sand, the boardwalk, and noone seems to really "get" it.
I feel for you, hope you can find a blow up palm tree. :)

5:04 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Noooooo! Bummer, dude! Connie from SoCal.

5:14 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hmmm. . . those all sound suspiciously like sites of AF bases. . .

Sorry you're not heading to L.A. While it was the most boring base in the world to work at, it was bliss once you went out the front gate.

Unlike Hill, which is boring everywhere.

Then again, I'd take Hill over "Why Not?" Minot any day. . .

9:05 PM  

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