Friday, April 15, 2005
A Bit of Clarification for our Non-American Brethren
The United States broke away from England because of money and equal representation in government. Basically, we didn’t like paying taxes. So how do we crazy Americans celebrate this wonderful achievement? Every April 15th we commemorate our hatred of paying taxes by… paying our taxes.
On paper, our tax laws are 44,000 pages long, and there isn’t a single person on earth who can decipher them properly. So every time we file our taxes, we’re gambling… or betting on the fact that our mistakes won’t be picked up by the Gov. I guess gambling is an American tradition, making tax day sort of fun.
I completed my taxes 3 weeks ago to make sure I could celebrate April 15th properly. I plan on driving by the long lines at the tax preparation offices and post offices, pulling out my megaphone, and laughing hysterically at all the morons who’ve waited nearly 5 months to file. After that, we’re all headed to the pubs to toast and pay tribute to the Tax Gods, asking for mercy and hoping our gamble pays off. If not, we’ll be getting a knock on the door some time this summer. (I’ll be drinking a lot to ward off those tax demons)
If you’re really confused about our tax system (as we all are), here’s a good read.
Good Weekend Links
Chirac is threatening that the evil U.S. will benefit if the EU constitution isn’t voted in. Remember the movie ‘Armageddon’? Where’s that giant meteorite that smashes into Paris when we need it the most?
When Dolphins Get Better Treatment than Humans:
Here’s a link to CNN’s story about some dolphins that beached themselves down in Florida this week.
Feeding and Care
The dolphins at the conservancy, identified by numbers, are hand-fed three times a day with herring stuffed with vitamins and medication.
"Today we made the first critical steps in getting them to eat dead fish and to eat them out of our hands," Banick said.
It's a race against time and feeding times must be strictly kept to.
For Robert Lingenfelser, who heads the conservancy, this day's feeding preparations have not been moving fast enough.
"Have they been tubed yet?" Lingenfelser asks a volunteer.
"No, they haven't," the volunteer responds.
"Now! Now! These guys are two hours behind schedule," Lingenfelser tells them.
Banick understands the commitment she has made -- the rehabilitation will likely last weeks, not days.
But the surviving dolphins have become stronger, and the volunteers hope they will soon be able to return to the open sea.
Does anyone see the inequity between how the dolphins were discussed vs. how Terri Schiavo was discussed in the Media?
The beautiful, majestic beached dolphins were helpless and in need. The volunteers were doing everything they could to give them food, water, and the proper medical care in the hopes that they could survive.
The vegetable Terri Schiavo, who was slowly being starved to death, deserved to die. The volunteers/protesters who tried to give her food, water, and proper medical care were simply religious, right-wing extremists.
posted by El Capitan at 11:37 AM