Dude, where's the beach?

Thursday, November 30, 2006
Warning Label Generator - Fun For The Whole Family

I could spend all day using this site. You get to create your own warning labels. I've already posted some good signs around our office snack room.

Here are some examples.

posted by El Capitan at 11:08 AM 2 comments

Wednesday, November 29, 2006
Speaker Elect Pelosi, "No Al-Qaeda In Iraq"

Okay.... let's see here. If there is no Al-Qaeda in Iraq, then I guess this didn't happen today.

Al Qaeda In Iraq Calls Pope's Visit 'Crusader Campaign'

And, let's see... I guess Al-Zarqawi never existed?

Once again, you get who you elect.

posted by El Capitan at 5:09 PM 3 comments

Air Force Major Troy Gilbert now listed as 'Whereabouts Unknown'

11/29/2006 - WASHINGTON (AFPN) -- "Department of Defense officials announced today the identity of an Airman listed as duty status - whereabouts unknown.

Maj. Troy L. Gilbert was the pilot of an Air Force F-16 Fighting Falcon engaged in support of coalition ground combat operations that crashed approximately 20 miles northwest of Baghdad Nov. 27.

Major Gilbert is assigned to the 309th Fighter Squadron, Luke Air Force Base, Ariz. and currently deployed to the 332nd Expeditionary Wing, Balad Air Base, Iraq. An investigation is ongoing."
________________________________________

In previous OIF crashes, the Air Force categorized a pilot's status as 'Whereabouts Unknown' while analyzing the DNA to confirm their identity. Once a pilot's identity has been verified, the status is changed to reflect KIA.

Wherever Major Gilbert is, I pray he is at peace.

Also, never forget
Sgt Matt Maupin,
Ahmed Qusai al-Taei

posted by El Capitan at 3:42 PM 4 comments

Sylvester Stalone.... WTF?

Sylvester Stalone.. Posterboy for why taking steroids and eating fried peanut butter and banana sandwiches are bad for you. Is it me, or does Sly look like Elvis right before he croaked on a toilet?

My friend.... Mr. Rambo.... horse tranquilizers are for horses, not humans. You'd better pull out of it fast or you'll be pushing up daisies on the porcelain throne faster than you can say ' Yo Adrian'.

Yo... I'll have another fried peanut butter and banana sandwich with a diet coke please. I'm watching my girl-ish figure.

posted by El Capitan at 8:44 AM 1 comments

Viva La Revolucion!

Senator Chuck Schumer: "We're in better shape than [Republicans] are, because they don't realize that Reaganomics is dead, that the Reagan philosophy is dead," he said. "We realize that New Deal democracy, which is still our paradigm, which is sort of appeal to each group ... that doesn't work any more."

He had said a bit earlier, "The old Reagan theory which dominated -- which is, 'Government is bad, it's out of touch, chop off its hands as soon as it moves.' -- is over."

El Capitan: "Trust me... the revolution, the theory that Government is not more powerful or capable than the individual, is not dead. What's dead is our patience in dealing with 'conservatives by name only' who have bastardized the Reagan Revolution for their own political gain. The indecisive, unproductive 'days of the moderate' have passed. It's time to grow a pair and stand firm in your principles."

Viva la resistance!

posted by El Capitan at 8:32 AM 3 comments

Tuesday, November 28, 2006
The Strong and The Weak in NATO

Today President Bush and NATO Chief Jaap de Hoop Scheffer are talking to every member-state of the Organization to try and get more teeth behind the NATO forces currently fighting in Afghanistan. As usual, there are those who have been backing up their rhetoric, while others have been sitting on their asses behind the lines on 'cush' bases, doing nothing but using up vital resources.

Canada, no matter what you may think of her, has really been kicking ass in the South. They've also been taking the brunt of casualties in a region where the Taliban have been conducting offensive after offensive to try and take back power. There is no excuse for Germany or Italy to not be involved and fighting along side the Canadians.

There's also no excuse for other NATO countries to not jump into the fight.

Sadly, whatever the President is saying today will not be acted upon, and the US, UK, Canada and Netherlands will continue to lead the fight in Afghanistan. I'm starting to worry about the strength and cohesion of the only true military alliance left on earth. If NATO disappears, all of Europe will lose the only unified international fighting force it has.

posted by El Capitan at 9:06 AM 1 comments

F-16 On Close Air Support Mission Goes Down Near Baghdad

"11/28/2006 - SOUTHWEST ASIA (AFPN) -- The interim safety investigation board convened by U.S. Central Command Air Forces has begun its efforts to gather evidence to determine what caused a U.S. Air Force F-16CG Fighting Falcon to crash approximately 20 miles northwest of Baghdad at about 1:35 p.m. Nov. 27.

The single-seat jet was in direct support of extensive coalition ground combat operations when it crashed in an uninhabited field.

Coalition reconnaissance assets and fighter aircraft were overhead when the crash occurred and confirmed that insurgents were in the vicinity of the crash site immediately following the crash.

Ground forces secured the crash scene Nov. 27 as soon as the combat operations in the area ceased. The primary concerns of USCENTAF in responding to this incident have been the safety of coalition forces and the recovery of the pilot.

The pilot was not found at the crash site and his status cannot be confirmed at this time. The investigation board has collected DNA samples from the crash site and will release results upon completion of testing.

The F-16 was deployed to the 332nd Air Expeditionary Wing at Balad Air Base, Iraq. The accident investigation convening authority is Air Combat Command.

(Courtesy of U.S. Central Command Air Forces Public Affairs)"
_____________________________________

Of course my thoughts and prayers are with the Pilot and his family, friends, and fellow Airmen who served with him. Nothing could be harder for the young Airmen who maintained that F-16 daily when they hear that their bird, and most likely the pilot they supported, never came home.

There are Army and Marine deaths almost daily in Iraq, and the loss of an Air Force Pilot is no different. Whenever a US Servicemember dies in combat we're all going to mourn the loss of a brother, a sister, a son, a daughter, a friend.

Keep all of our young men and women in your prayers. Whether they're driving convoy, jumping out of Strykers, medivac-ing the wounded out of harms way, storming insurgent houses in the dead of night, or flying overhead to support and fight for the troops below, they're doing it for you and me.

posted by El Capitan at 8:47 AM 0 comments

Monday, November 27, 2006
How Those Now In Power Really Think of the US Military

Charles Rangel, John Kerry, and countless others have all come out at various times to portray military members as below average, incapable, and intellectually inept.

Looks like someone has already created a 'Democrats for 2008' advertisement to capitalize on the growing anti-military swing in the party. (Hat Tip to my Bro-in-law for sending me this. I know he'd rather be blowing things up then sitting behind a desk at this moment)

I just hope this doesn't hurt the 'Caveman' constituency.

posted by El Capitan at 8:27 AM 4 comments

Wednesday, November 22, 2006
Great Blogs... Great People

I've been extremely lazy with updating my links over the last few months. There are some awesome sites out there that I've been reading lately, yet I haven't linked them.

As you can tell I'm trying to update the site, so stay tuned over the weekend for an update of links and other cool things.

RWA @ Thoughts from the Heart of Dixie
- Good site from down south

Mom @ Yankee Mom
- 'Mom' is a mother to a new Army private, and she lives out where I grew up. She is a huge supporter of the military, and really good person with a heart of gold.

Hub @ An Active Duty Air Force Family
- A great blog with a good perspective on family life in the Air Force.

Zopher @ Who's undergoing a blog face-lift at the moment
- Funny guy. I hope his site is back up soon.

Coach Mark @ My Weekly Thoughts
- Another good read. Well thought-out and insightful posts... something I can't seem to do myself.

Air Force Wife @ Air Force Family
- Air Force Wife has recently stopped blogging because she's moved up in the world. She continues to work hard to support every service member and their family.

Reel Fanatic @ Reel Fanatic
- Great movie review site! 'Reel' is a real funny guy.

MissBirdlegs... who I wish had a site.
- What can I say about MissBirdlegs? She's one of the best, and I can't thank her enough. One of these days when I'm back down in 'Bama I promise to stop on by her place for some sweet tea.

Jake Silver @ The Jake Silver Show
- Funny guy, and another great Air Force blog.

Of course there are a few folks that are already linked on my site, yet I don't give them enough props. They're all daily reads for me, and they really are some of the nicest people out there. I couldn't wish enough happiness or success to a nicer bunch.

Sinclair @ Sinclair's Realm
Dave @ Garfield Ridge
AllieCadem @ Can I Have Some Whine With That Cheese
Desult @ Desultory Butterfly
MauserGirl @ The Adventures of Mauser.Girl
Lindsay @ LindsayFincher.Com

Happy Thanksgiving to all of you

posted by El Capitan at 12:10 PM 8 comments

Tuesday, November 21, 2006
How I'll Be Celebrating Thanksgiving

First off, we'll be having dinner with our new neighbors. They're originally from Puerto Rico, so we're promised a well-cooked turkey with a good sense of rhythm. (H/T Desult for the pic)

Afterwards, we'll be dabbling in some fun and games. Of course we'll avoid using any animals or small, fur-bearing woodland creatures.

Next, Comedy. We all need a good laugh, so I'm bringing home all the funny DVDs I can find.

And finally... a good brewsky. All I have left are some Bulgarian brews I bought from Sam's club last month. (Yes, typically a 12 pack lasts 2 months in my fridge) Do any of you 'liquid bread' experts recommed something for the holidays?

Most importantly, I'll be giving thanks to everyone in this world who truly gives a damn about their fellow men.... including, the U.S. Soldiers/Sailors/Airmen at home and abroad fighting WWIII.

Cheers my friends!

posted by El Capitan at 9:37 AM 4 comments

Japanese Sub 'Grazes' Civilian Vessel?

I totally forgot that the Japanese have submarines.

"A Japanese submarine collided with a civilian cargo ship during exercises in waters off southern Japan Tuesday, defense officials said. There were no immediate reports of any injuries.
The Maritime Self-Defense Forces submarine grazed the civilian vessel during surfacing exercises about 30 miles off the southeastern coast of Miyazaki on Japan's southern island of Kyushu, a defense agency spokesman, speaking on condition of anonymity in accord with agency policy.

No injuries were reported "

So now the question is, what do Japanese subs look like? I thought they were all sunk.

I hear they have an awesome 'Crusty Crab' burger joint on board.

posted by El Capitan at 9:28 AM 0 comments

Monday, November 20, 2006
Time To Call It A Career 'Kramer'

Yes, I really am an A-Hole.

Michael Richards has finally lost it. Just read the TMZ account and see the video and you'll agree... it's time for him to disappear.

Either that, or he needs to go through serious rehab and give a 'Mel Gibson' style public apology. Sadly, it probably wouldn't work after this incident.

There are very few lines that can be crossed at a comedy club, and this was one of them.

I don't have much pitty for the guy. He may be unemployed, but he's still filthy rich.

posted by El Capitan at 11:00 AM 1 comments

Devastating wit....sparse, but deadly

I wish people traded words like this in today's world.

"A modest little person, with much to be modest about."
-- Winston Churchill

"He has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire."
-- Winston Churchill

"I have never killed a man, but I have read many obituaries with great
pleasure."
-- Clarence Darrow

"He has never been known to use a word that might send a reader to the
dictionary."
-- William Faulkner (about Ernest Hemingway)

"Poor Faulkner. Does he really think big emotions come from big words?"
-- Ernest Hemingway (about William Faulkner)

"Thank you for sending me a copy of your book; I'll waste no time
reading it."
-- Moses Hadas

"He can compress the most words into the smallest idea of any man I
know."
-- Abraham Lincoln

"I've had a perfectly wonderful evening. But this wasn't it."
-- Groucho Marx

"I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved
of it."
-- Mark Twain

"He has no enemies, but is intensely disliked by his friends."
-- Oscar Wilde

"I am enclosing two tickets to the first night of my new play; bring a
friend.... if you have one."
-- George Bernard Shaw to Winston Churchill

"Cannot possibly attend first night, will attend second... if there is
one."
-- Winston Churchill, in response

"I feel so miserable without you; it's almost like having you here."
-- Stephen Bishop

"He is a self-made man and worships his creator."
-- John Bright

"I've just learned about his illness. Let's hope it's nothing trivial."
-- Irvin S. Cobb

"He is not only dull himself, he is the cause of dullness in others."
-- Samuel Johnson

"He is simply a shiver looking for a spine to run up."
-- Paul Keating

"He had delusions of adequacy."
-- Walter Kerr

There's nothing wrong with you that reincarnation won't cure."
-- Jack E. Leonard

"He has the attention span of a lightning bolt."
-- Robert Redford

"They never open their mouths without subtracting from the sum of human
knowledge."
-- Thomas Brackett Reed

"He inherited some good instincts from his Quaker forebears, but by
diligent hard work, he overcame them."
-- James Reston (about Richard Nixon)

"In order to avoid being called a flirt, she always yielded easily."
-- Charles, Count Talleyrand

"He loves nature in spite of what it did to him."
-- Forrest Tucker

"Why do you sit there looking like an envelope without any address on
it?"
-- Mark Twain

"His mother should have thrown him away and kept the stork."
-- Mae West

"Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go."
-- Oscar Wilde

"He uses statistics as a drunken man uses lamp-posts... for support
rather than illumination."
-- Andrew Lang (1844-1912)

"He has Van Gogh's ear for music."
-- Billy Wilder

posted by El Capitan at 9:11 AM 3 comments

Casino Royale... An Excellent Movie

Just a very brief review for this flick - OUT-FREAK'N-STANDING!

Finally, James Bond is someone who is more than just a stuffed suit lady's man. The makers of this film nailed it by hiring Daniel Craig as Bond, as well as with sticking to the original Ian Fleming concept of 007.

I've read Ace of Spade's very drawn out review of the movie, and I disagree with his critique of the film's ending. Had the movie not remained true to the book, most fans would be complaining. The fact that Ace is complaining about the ending sticking too closely to the book is ridiculous. Had the movie ended differently, it would have resembled the typical 'Pierce Brosnan' flick where they give you just enough story to make a buck and send you home. In Casino Royale they're actually trying to give you a complete Bond story, from beginning to end.

In other words, this movie is really one of the most well thought-out and executed flicks I've seen. Great action, great slow parts, great quasi-romantic interludes.... it's got it all.

In my 'Movies Are Like Alcohol' rating system, I give Casino Royale a warm 10-year old Laphroaig Scotch (one of the best). Takes you two hours to drink it, but from start to finish you'll enjoy ever sip.

Made me want to go gamble $10M. Any loan sharks out there?

posted by El Capitan at 8:40 AM 2 comments

Play Station 3

Speaking of video games, 18 y/o managed to buy three Play Station 3s over the last few weeks. He pre-ordered 2, and waited in line 30 hours for his 3rd. He's planning on selling them on Ebay (like everyone else), but the way the auctions are going right now, he should still make a pretty penny. Last night I noticed a few consoles going for $1400+, whereas he only spent $600 bones each for his own.

For once I think the kid had a great idea. Yes he's had others, but they typically get overshadowed by the boneheaded moves your typical 18 y/o makes.

Let's hope his brilliant streak continues.

posted by El Capitan at 8:33 AM 0 comments

Snow Already.....

Woke up to an interesting sight this morning. Snow! Had about an inch of the white stuff all over the place. After taking my girls around the stores to look at Christmas lights and see Santa last night, it was very nice to see snow this morning. It reminded me that Christmas just around the corner, and I'm settling into this 'Daddy' gig more and more every year.

My 7 year old is at that age where she's asking about what it was like when I was a kid. On Saturday she was telling me how much she couldn't wait for the snow, and she asked if I used to wait for the snow when I was a kid. I got to tell her about what it was like growin up on the beach in California where it never snowed, so I really didn't know what snow was like until I was much older. She was so fascinated that it never snowed where I grew up. Such a foreign concept to a little girl who was born in Alaska, yet she's half Australian. Snow is normal to her.

I guess that's why I was taken back this morning at the sight of snow. It's still a new thing to me, and I've been looking forward to it as much as she has.

For those of your who haven't had kids yet, one of the many perks of being a father is that you get to experience life through your children's eyes.

Well, that, and you always have a great excuse to stay up late and play video games.

posted by El Capitan at 8:24 AM 0 comments

Friday, November 17, 2006
Wounded Warriors in Need

From an email sent to me from my brother-in-law this week. When he's not playing with massive amounts of explosives, he's keeping an eye out for his fellow Vets.

Remember Walter Reed Medical Center when you're shopping for Christmas.

---Karin and I were at the Walter Reed Army Medical Center yesterday and stopped by the Medical Family Assistance Center. The wounded, being treated at the hospital, include all branches of the Armed Forces (Army, Marines, Sailors, Air Force and Coast Guard, both men and women). The Family Assistance Center provides assistance to the wounded during their stay at the hospital and the family member (normally spouse or mother of the wounded individual).

Because of the land mines and Improvised Explosive Devices (IEDs), there are many amputees in wheelchairs that must be pushed from place-to-place within the hospital and grounds, and from their quarters to the various clinics. When wounds are from mines and IEDs, they include multiple wounds to all parts of the body involving all clinics from A to Z.

Because of the expedient method to get them from the battlefield to WRAMC, the wounded arrive with nothing. Their personal items are in Iraq or Afghanistan to be shipped to them later. Therefore, the wounded men and women need many critical items to sustain them. If you would like to contribute items, the address to mail the items to (or drop off items) is:

WALTER REED ARMY MEDICAL CENTER
MEDICAL FAMILY ASSISTANCE CENTER
BUILDING 2, 3RD FLOOR, ROOM 3E01
6900 GEORGIA AVENUE, N.W.
WAHSINGTON, D.C. 2001

Link to the Hospital Site.

WISH LIST FOLLOWS (Please, no used items or money.):

1. Prepackaged candy, cookies, and crackers (no homemade) (See NOTE Below)
2. Weight lifting gloves (for wheelchair patients - and there are many of them)
3. Pillows stuffed with polystyrene beads (very soft)
4. Postage Stamps
5. Pre-Paid Phone Cards
6. Flannel Pajamas
7. Shoes (size 9-12)
8. Sweatshirts / Jackets (zipped & hooded)
9. Break-away trousers (snaps or zips along legs)
10. Coats & Jackets (cold weather)
11. Gloves (cold weather)
12. Scarves (cold weather)
13. Backpacks (all black with single strap across the chest)
14. Carry-on size luggage (with wheels if possible)
15. Electric Razors
16. Umbrellas
17. Credit Cards, Prepaid (Gas, Gift cards & Food for Giant & Safeway nearby)
18. Portable DVD Players
19. DVDs -Action to Comedy (use common sense as far as content and subject)
20. iPODs
21. The wounded are normally very young and a nice stuffed animal cheers them up.

NOTE: The Commissary Manager at the Quantico Marine Base provides us with many goodies through the Vendors. All we have to do is deliver them to the Family Assistance Center.

posted by El Capitan at 10:09 AM 4 comments

Monday, November 13, 2006
Classic Defense Acquisition Blunder

First, the story....

F-16 Simulators 'Substandard'

"Lockheed Martin was paid $145 million for computerized F-16 pilot-training simulators that were "substandard," according to a Defense Department audit.

Simulators create realistic flight conditions on the ground, allowing training for a variety of missions without the costly wear and tear on planes. But Lockheed's simulators allow training on only two of 16 missions specified in the Air Force contract, and pilots must continue using the F-16s "at a cost of more than $5,400 an hour," the audit said.

The Air Force has been taking delivery of "substandard" simulators since June 2003 and has continued to pay full cost for the equipment and services, the audit said. The only sanction has been to dock Lockheed $561,000, or less than 1 percent of the contract payments.

Assistant Inspector General Paul Granetto criticized that decision. He said the Air Force did a poor job of testing to ensure that deficiencies were corrected before delivery, and he didn't recommend the service seek a refund. In the future, the Air Force should pay only for the simulation services that Lockheed actually provides, he said.

Lockheed won the contract in June 1999. The contract has a potential value of $359 million, and it expires in June. The Air Force has put out for bids for a new simulator contract that would be worth as much as $582 million.

Warren Wright, spokesman for Lockheed's Orlando-based Simulation, Training and Support unit, said the company "has worked in good faith with the Air Force." He declined to say whether Lockheed Martin has bid on the new program."

Second, my recommendation....

Microsoft Flight Simulator

Does the Air Force understand how much money they could be saving if they went with something this basic that actually worked like it is supposed to?

Unbelievable. I thought we'd come so far since the days of $10,000 hammers, and $20k toilet seats.

posted by El Capitan at 10:05 AM 4 comments

Friday, November 10, 2006
Jack Palance... A Dying Breed.

One of the last 'real men' of Hollywood has passed. It'll be another 100 years before someone has the 'jewels' to do one handed push-ups in front of millions at age 75.

posted by El Capitan at 11:02 PM 0 comments

Armistice Day... Veterans Day

First, a brief history of Veterans Day can be found here.

Also, read just a few of the citations from this list of all U.S. Medal of Honor winners throughout history.

posted by El Capitan at 11:20 AM 1 comments

Wednesday, November 08, 2006
Score Two Wins for Veterans

Board Decision Makes it Clear: Hire The Vet
Washington Post
November 7, 2006
Pg. D4

A federal board has reaffirmed the government's obligation to show a preference for military veterans in hiring, even when federal agencies use a special program designed to quickly fill jobs with applicants who have a high grade-point average.
(read on)

Vets Get Help Starting Their Own Businesses
USA TODAY
November 8, 2006
Pg 3

Veterans in need of a job after returning from Iraq and Afghanistan are getting offers of help for an alternative: setting up their own small businesses.

More than 200 companies nationally are providing benefits, discounted fees or special financing to help honorably discharged U.S. military veterans purchase franchises and receive training to operate their own businesses.

Franchise companies that deal with everything from pizzas to plumbing say veterans already have many of the skills needed to become successful entrepreneurs, including self-discipline and an ability to closely follow a business plan.

"They make wonderful franchisees," says Dina Dwyer-Owens, president and CEO of the Dwyer Group, a Texas company that operates seven franchise brands providing home, auto and commercial services.
(read on)

posted by El Capitan at 9:05 AM 0 comments

Proposed Republican Party Slogan for 2008

"We'll run on conservative principles, stick to those conservative principles,

and keep our hands off your money and your interns."

Viva La Revolucion!

posted by El Capitan at 8:30 AM 0 comments

Democrats and Socialist Dictators Around The World....

You just took back power in the U.S. House of Representatives... Where are you going next???

Hoooray!

Yipeee!

Viva la Socialism!

We're going to Disneyland!!!!!!

Of course, after that we'll be doing what we can do destroy you. Just business as usual.

posted by El Capitan at 8:22 AM 0 comments

Tuesday, November 07, 2006
FAA Flight Data Compiled to Make a Cool Video

All we are, Dude, is like... dust in the wind.

posted by El Capitan at 11:09 PM 0 comments

Vote or Die, Part III

Vote, or else she'll throw you out like K-Fed.

posted by El Capitan at 4:55 PM 1 comments

Vote or Die, part Duece

Vote... or else. Any questions?

posted by El Capitan at 11:11 AM 0 comments

Vote or Die

These people really want you to vote for a specific party today....

Don't make them happy.

posted by El Capitan at 11:07 AM 0 comments

Monday, November 06, 2006
We're Losing The Americas

Daniel Ortega Recaptures Nicaragua

"MANAGUA, Nicaragua - Leftist Sandinista leader Daniel Ortega appeared Monday to have easily defeated four other presidential candidates in his long quest to return to power 16 years after a U.S.-backed rebellion helped force him from office, according to a respected electoral observer group projecting victory based on a sampling of the votes."

"Ortega's victory, if confirmed by final results, would give Venezuelan President Hugo Chavez a strong ally in the region while threatening U.S. aid to the second-poorest nation in the hemisphere."

A little insight into Mr. Ortega from the CS Monitor. This guy is bad.

"Just staying in the running has looked doubtful for Ortega at times. His credibility has taken a beating since he signed a self-serving pact in 1999 with political rival and former President Arnoldo Aleman, now serving a 20-year sentence for embezzlement; his grown-up stepdaughter accused him in 1998 of abusing and raping her for years; and his former comrade-in-arms Herty Lewites is now running against him, mounting the first serious challenge to his leadership from within the Sandinista ranks."

Also don't forget that Mexico just barely avoided electing a leftist president. There's a serious 'Domino Effect' taking place south of the border, and it seems as though very little is being done to stop it. One can only hope that we are in fact doing something under the radar, but as of now the leftist revolution (and it is a leftist revolution) is sweeping up Democracies without slowing down.

So let me repeat what's happening in Central and South America.

We're Losing The Americas!

Can I say a little louder?

We're Losing The Americas!

We fixed this problem before. Hopefully we'll have the 'Cajones' to do it again.

It's time to put up or shut up people. Viva La Revolucion!

posted by El Capitan at 10:06 AM 0 comments

Friday, November 03, 2006
US Air Force Cyber Command - Our Own Geek Squad

8th Air Force to become new cyber command (AF Link)

"The aim is to develop a major command that stands alongside Air Force Space Command and Air Combat Command as the provider of forces that the President, combatant commanders and the American people can rely on for preserving the freedom of access and commerce, in air, space and now cyberspace."

Now of course we semi-normal Air Force members wanted a shot at being a part of this newly minted Command, so a few of us downloaded the official brief which explains the prerequisites for joining AF Cyber Command.

Turns out that most of us just aren't cut out for Cyber Command duty since we don't live in our parent's basements or dress up in Dungeons and Dragons costumes.

My God, we're going to have a field day with this command. Sure, it's a dream come true for the hackers and gamers of the world who want to go legitimate, but it's still going to be easy to make fun of.

I.Can't.Wait.

posted by El Capitan at 10:04 AM 10 comments

New Design and Direction

It's that time of year again when I get the fever, and the only prescription is more cowbell... and a new design for my blog.

Here's a link to last year's best weblog designs.

So, I'm soliciting any inputs, suggestions, or ideas on where I should go with this site. I'm also looking for any suggestions on subject matter. Any requests?

Let 'em rip.

posted by El Capitan at 9:27 AM 0 comments

Running Out of Seafood My Ass

All Seafood Will Run Out by 2050? Obviously these 'educated buffoons' who wrote the study have never flown across the Pacific Ocean. Do they even know how much ocean there is out there?

"Whether we looked at tide pools or studies over the entire world's ocean, we saw the same picture emerging. In losing species we lose the productivity and stability of entire ecosystems," said the lead author Boris Worm of Dalhousie University in Halifax, Nova Scotia.
I'm not sure Dr. Worm has been out much. Sure, I'll give him the benefit of the doubt about ecological damage being inflicted to tidal regions along inhabited coastlines, but those areas are so miniscule compared to the rest of the ocean. Judging the ocean's health by studying the coastline is like a doctor making a diagnosis by looking at a mole on someone's pinky toe.

The ocean is just too big for us to screw up any time soon. Sure, we could nuke a lot of it, but that still wouldn't cause a collapse, and it certainly wouldn't ruin our food supply.

I'm getting really tired of these guys saying the world is going to end. Then again I'm willing to compromise. Let's give half a continent... say Central Australia or Northern Canada, to every insane mad scientist who believes that Humans are destroying the planet. Let them make their own laws, cities, cars, clothing, food, and produce their own energy. Let them do it their own eco-friendly way for 50 years, then see if they've made a difference.

Wait a second... we've already done that. It's called North Korea. They're the most energy efficient nation on earth.

North Korea... The Most Energy Efficient Nation On Earth, and the shining Beacon of Ecological Utopia for every eco-friendly moonbat around the world.

posted by El Capitan at 8:58 AM 1 comments

Thursday, November 02, 2006
Terrorists Endorse US Candidates

I kid you not....

Mideast terror leaders to U.S.: Vote Democrat

JERUSALEM - Everybody has an opinion about next Tuesday's midterm congressional election in the U.S. - including senior terrorist leaders interviewed by WND who say they hope Americans sweep the Democrats into power because of the party's position on withdrawing from Iraq, a move, as they see it, that ensures victory for the worldwide Islamic resistance.

The terrorists told WorldNetDaily an electoral win for the Democrats would prove to them Americans are "tired."

They rejected statements from some prominent Democrats in the U.S. that a withdrawal from Iraq would end the insurgency, explaining an evacuation would prove resistance works and would compel jihadists to continue fighting until America is destroyed.

They said a withdrawal would also embolden their own terror groups to enhance "resistance" against Israel.

"Of course Americans should vote Democrat," Jihad Jaara, a senior member of the Al Aqsa Martyrs Brigades terror group and the infamous leader of the 2002 siege of Bethlehem's Church of the Nativity, told WND.

Still no word on when Bin Laden's next pre-election endorsement tape will arrive in the mail. I hear he's reconsidering the Webb vs. Allen race in Virginia. Must have been those racey books.

posted by El Capitan at 1:55 PM 2 comments

Happy Birthday Matt!

Beefcake.... BEEFCAAAAAKE!!!!

The Man (almost), The Myth, the Legend.... My Stepson Matthew turned 17 today. One more year to go. He's looking into possibly joining the Army, although we keep telling him the Air Force is the way to go. For some reason he keeps saying something about working for a living. Not sure why?

Very proud of you Matt. Keep up the great work at school and at work. He's the best multi-plex cinema bouncer in Ohio. He gets to kick out all the thieves and theater hoppers. Believe it or not he just finished two years working with Ford Modeling Agency out of Chicago. Not too shabby.

Party at our house Friday night. Not sure if he'll enjoy the Blues Clues cake and decorations, but that's what he gets for having 3 younger sisters.

posted by El Capitan at 11:45 AM 0 comments

How Not to Greet a General

"You Must Respect Mah Authoritay!"

When standing at attention and holding a door for a general, be prepared for anything. I was so busy concentrating on standing at attention and holding the door properly, when he stopped and asked how I was doing I just stood there like a deer in the headlights.

Errrr, uhhhhh, duhhhh, 'Morning General?'

Great first impression. Of course my boss, who was standing behind the General, couldn't have turned more purple.

Side note: To all of my peeps digging crap holes in Greenland, I'll see you tonight.

My wife was happy to hear there's a woman behind every tree up there.

posted by El Capitan at 9:58 AM 1 comments

No Grunting? Damn...

Man Escorted From Planet Fitness Gym For Grunting

Argibay said he was at a multi-press station, getting ready to squat about 500 pounds when the forbidden sin happened. "I let out a grunt, squatted down, back up, grunt again. That's it," explained Argibay. "Basically, grunt, grunt, basic breathing in heavy, and breathing out."Grunting is commonplace at most gyms, but not Planet Fitness, which discourages so-called "musclehead behavior."
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Ironically I have this same sign in my downstairs bathroom. Although, instead of 'No Bandanas' mine reads 'No Bananas.'

"No grunting or screaming" is listed, along with "no bandanas or do-rags."

Hopefully this 'No Grunting' trend doesn't spread into the Tennis world. Their ratings would plummit.

posted by El Capitan at 9:53 AM 0 comments

Wednesday, November 01, 2006
US Air Force Education Statistics for 2005

USAF 2005 Educational Statistics

Enlisted
(Percent, Total Number)
Some College (<2 Years) 73.6% 203,222
AA/AS Degree or equivalent hours 15.6% 43,074
Bachelor's Degree 4.6% 12,701
Master's Degree 0.7% 1,933
PhD or Professional Degree .01% 28

Officers
Bachelor's Degree 51.6% 37,798
Master's Degree 38.8% 28,422
Doctoral Degree 1.4% 1,026
Professional Degree 8.2% 6,007

The Heritage Foundation also has a good study about the quality of all US Forces

National Youth High School Graduation Rate = 75%
Military Recruit High School Graduation Rate = 98%

92.1% of Officers held baccalaureate degrees or higher in 2004.

______________________________________

When compared to nearly every civilian educational statistic, the members of the Armed Forces surpass the educational levels of their civilian peers.

The only thing most of us can't compete with is the fact that we weren't born in Massachusetts with a silver spoon up our keisters, and we didn't serve in Viet-Naaahhhhmm.

posted by El Capitan at 11:41 AM 1 comments

Winning Every Battle, Yet losing The War

Please read this article. In this simple New York Post piece Mr. Amir Taheri accomplishes what the US Department of Defense has failed miserably at doing since March 2003. Since liberating Iraq we have not lost a single battle, yet we continue losing the Public Relations war... the only war our enemies know how to fight.

Public opinion is THE only method for gaining ground the terrorists have at their disposal, and they seem to be doing it well. As you'll read, the enemy in Iraq failed at achieving every goal they had set for the Ramadan holiday... except for one: Making Americans back home think things are going bad and we need to pull out. Things are not going bad.

Go here, and here, and here and you'll soon see that we are indeed doing everything we set out to do in Iraq.

THE ENEMY FAILS IN IRAQ'S BLOODY RAMADAN, THE FORCES OF CHAOS LOSE

by Amir Taheri
New York Post
October 29, 2006

AMERICAN angst over Iraq typically misses two key points.

First: The United States has already achieved the goals it had proclaimed when it set out to liberate the country in 2003. Saddam Hussein and his war machinery are gone, with a democracy in their place, inspiring reform across the region.

Second: This success threatens countless interests - so the many enemies of the new Iraq are attempting to derail it. Yet their only real hope of victory lies with America public opinion.

Consider the events of the last month.

NEW Iraq's various enemies had designated the Muslim fasting month of Ramadan that has just ended as "The Month of Battle and Victory" (shahr al-maarakah wa al-nasr). Through their various statements, distributed on jihadist Web sites and TV channels owned by Arab despots, they had fixed a number of objectives that they had hoped to achieve with a view to demoralizing the American people and strengthening the cut-and-run party in Washington and London.

The average televiewer in the United States or Europe may well conclude that the enemies of new Iraq have achieved their Ramadan objectives. This has been the deadliest month in well over a year, with at least 600 civilians killed in several dozen insurgent operations. The Iraqi army and police lost more than 180 men, while U.S. forces suffered 98 dead.

The perception created is that of a situation in which the terrorists can strike where and when they want while U.S. and Iraqi forces are murdered without inflicting the slightest harm on the enemy.

Nevertheless, the Saddamites, the jihadists and the militias sponsored by Tehran not only achieved none of their objectives but also suffered their biggest losses since the start of the insurgency in 2004.

HERE are some of the objectives that the Jihadists, the Saddamites and other enemies of new Iraq had fixed for themselves but did not achieve:

* Seizing enough territory in and around the towns of Haditha and Aanah in the al-Anbar province to establish an "Islamic emirate" there. Despite several major attempts they failed, largely because a strong new coalition of Sunni Arab tribes in Anbar has entered the fight to flush the jihadists out of Iraq.

* To gain a foothold in Mosul, Iraq's largest Arab Sunni city, and turn it into a new base as Fallujah had been in 2004. Again, despite several attempts, the plan failed - thanks to the new Iraqi army backed by U.S. forces.

* To blow up the Shiite holy shrines in Karbala and Najaf just as was done in Samarrah last year. At least 12 suicide-bombers were sent to the two cities on the last day of Ramadan. The authorities decided to close the shrines for 48 hours, captured some of the would-be bombers and nipped the plot in the bud.

* Attacking the "Green Zone" in the heat of Baghdad, where most Iraqi government offices and the U.S. embassy are located. The insurgents made at least two attempts but failed, suffering heavy casualties.

* To paralyze the parliament by threatening to kill its members at a time they were discussing such key issues as federalism, a law for foreign investments in Iraq and the terms of an amnesty and national reconciliation. Again, despite several attempts on the lives of parliamentarians, the plot failed.

* To prevent Arab Sunni clerics from traveling to Mecca to sign a concordat with their Shiite clerics, calling for an end to sectarian killings. Again, the jihadist efforts failed, as all key figures in the Arab Sunni clerical elite of Iraq went to Mecca and signed the concordat.

* Muqtada al-Sadr and his Jaish al-Mahdi (Mahdi Army) tried to seize control of the southern Shiite city of al-Amarah with a well-planned attack reportedly designed by Iranian advisers. However, the attack failed and Sadr's gunmen were flushed out of the city.

* Sadr's militia, in alliance with local gangsters, tried to seize control of part of the border with Iran through which crude oil is smuggled from Iraq to the Iranian refinery at Kermanshah. The attempt failed - thanks to the new Iraqi army, which now controls virtually the whole of the border outside the Kurdish areas.

* Despite numerous murders and abductions, the jihadist promise to force the total closure of hospitals, universities, schools, newspapers, TV stations and even barber shops was not fulfilled.

* A plot by Sadr militias to seize the Interior Ministry and reinstate the 1,300 of their members who had been purged by the new minister failed, again thanks to the new Iraqi police.

* Despite explicit murder threats, more than a dozen prominent Iraqi political figures, among them former Prime Minister Iyad Allawi and former Deputy Premier Ahmad Chalabi, returned to Baghdad after months spent abroad.

* Attempts at preventing the forthcoming local government elections by destroying voter lists and killing election organizers have failed. The elections will take place on schedule with all Shiite, Sunni and Kurdish and Christian parties already in the field.

* To drive a wedge between Prime Minister Nouri al-Maliki and Grand Ayatollah Ali-Muhamamd Sistani, the primus inter pares of the Shiite clergy. The attempt, backed by Sadr and others, failed when Maliki went to Najaf to acknowledge Sistani's position and secure his blessing for planned amnesty measures.

* To prevent the marking of the Eid al-Fitr (the end of Ramadan) by threatening people with massive suicide attacks. Again, despite several murder operations, the terrorists failed as countless Iraqis celebrated the feast with greater determination than previous years.

The various enemies of new Iraq murdered a large number of people in Ramadan, but failed to translate their crimes into any political gains for themselves. Politically, the Saddamites, the jihadists and other enemies of new Iraq have passed their worst month ever.

THE only success they have had is in the field of perceptions in the United States and the West in general. They could point to the fact that the "Iraq is a failure" chorus is at its loudest yet in the United States, while signs of a possible British loss of nerve multiply.

It is largely the hope of breaking the will of the American people and its key allies that keeps the insurgency alive.

posted by El Capitan at 10:10 AM 2 comments