Sunday, November 11, 2007
King Carlos takes on Chavez
President Chavez - "Point of Order!!! Point of Order!!! Amigo, I have a Point of Order!!!
President Zapatero - "Just a minute Hugo, I'm not finished discussing how our economy is barely sustainable due to our high taxation and out of control social programs."
President Chavez - "But I wanted to make a point about your predecessor, President Jose Maria Aznar. He was a conservative fascist! Why not blame everything on him. He was a crazy, maniacal fascist pig who should be imprisoned, or worse. Why haven't you executed him yet? If you kill him now, it will send a message to the fascist Bush that a socialist government is better than his."
President Zapatero - "Hugo, Spain is not a completely socialist government, it's a democracy. And my good friend President Aznar was not a fascist. He did many great things for our government. We just come from different political backgrounds have different ideas. I would never kill such an honorable leader."
President Chavez - "Do you have a pair? I'm serious, do you have a pair? I don't think you have a pair. If you did, you'd castrate all of the fascist pigs in your country. I did that in my country, and it's a better place in to live thanks to me."
King Juan Carlos - "This guy is insane. He's a freak'n moron. Didn't his government just put him in power for life too? What idiots."
President Chavez - "...and after I castrated all fascists, confiscated all major businesses and media, imprisoned detractors, and stifled freedom of speech, I've received nothing but praise by the UN, Jimmy Carter, and my good buddy Fidel Castro. Even better, every major Hollywood actor, director, and famous model has flown all the way to my country because they approve of what I'm doing. You can have that same following if you'd just...."
King Juan Carlos - "Will you just shut the eff' up!"
President Chavez - "Why... you can't talk to me like that. I'm the President of Venezuela! I'm important. You're just a King. I don't see any models or famous actors lined up outside your door."
King Juan Carlos - "You poor, poor little man."
President Chavez - "...and I bet Michael Moore and Danny Glover aren't making movies about you. I'm a man of the people. My people love me! Those who don't... well, they learn to love me in our special re-education camps. You know, the kind that John Kerry talked about supporting in Post-War Vietnam because they helped so many people."
Zapatero and Carlos - "Will you please shut the eff' up! Someone cut of this idiot's microphone."
President Chavez - "I had Kevin Spacey stop by last month, and Naomi Campbell last week. Don't forget Cindy Sheehan. Man, the stories I could tell you about her. They all love me! Everybody loves me!"
King Juan Carlos - "Call up the Conquistadors, we're going back into Venezuela to give this numb-nuts a much needed lesson in history."
King Juan Carlos - "Hugo, I'll see you on the battlefield, you bumbling moron."
President Ortega- "Hugo, I love you Hugo! You're my favorite Dictator Hugo! Remember, I fought against Ronald Reagan in Nicaragua! I'm important too Hugo! Viva Fidel!"
posted by El Capitan at 4:53 AM
6 Comments:
Coffeypot said...
Bravo, T.! We even go so far as to not buy gas from any CITGO stations (Venezuela supplied, and thus the money going to Hugo the Horrible, killer of thousands of his countrymen.) A few have even closed down around here.
1:15 PM
said...
I'll cross mine, too. I got such a kick out of hearing this on the news. What a douchebag & Hooray for King Carlos! I'm glad somebody had the stones to tell the big blowgourd to shut up. I've done it several times when I've seen him on TV, but to no effect. Had to just turn him off... :)
Happy Veteran's Day, TS - flags are gloriously flying here!!
Lindsay said...
Chavez is INSANE.
1:29 PM said...
Chavez'z mic was turned off and yet he still tried to interrupt Zapatero by yelling at him.
BTW, I've just heard one of the most compelling reasons to debunk 9/11 conspiracy theorists. If the all powerful American government is amoral enough to kill over 3,000 people, demolish the World Trade Center, attack our own Pentagon, and make United Flight 93 disappear, why would the government allow anyone trying to "expose the truth" to live? After all, NSA is reading every e-mail, listening to every phone call, and monitoring every Internet node. The moment those "Loose Change" guys posted their film, they would have disappeared. Guys like that will claim that the government can't touch them now since too many people know "the truth" but isn't the fact that they are still alive proof that there is no conspiracy that they have exposed?
Tumbleweed
said...
Very Fuuny. Thanks for the read.
12:10 AM Southern (in)Sanity said...
I think your version of the exchange between the two is even more hilarious than what really happened.
Great stuff.